Days like today when something goes wrong I wonder where did my dreams go? Why did I stray from the path I wanted so long ago. Some days I cuss as to why I did I let things go wrong. Other days I’m so thankful for the wrong turns. If it were for the paths that I didn’t plan I wouldn’t be where I am today. But then again if it weren’t for the paths that I didn’t plan on, I wouldn’t be where I am today. How do you find the happy median? When do you find the happy median? When is enough enough! I have made every attempt to believe in such things as; “Things happen for a reason, The glass is half full- never near empty, If you do good GOOD will be done onto you, You show dedication and reliability, support, happiness, positiveness and you will thrive in this world.” But in most situations I’m getting the short end of the stick.
People live life in one of two ways: As a victim or as a survivor. In most instants I AM a survivor- but most of the time I want to cry HELP- VICTIM! Remaining positive all the time is exhausting, being a victim is (appears) to be easier.
The negativity in other people only damage my already half cracked soul. I hold myself together with only a string of faith. The string is strong however, it sometimes just doesn’t hold. I typically don’t try to allow negative people to bother me but some days you just can’t take anymore. Things tend to build up regardless if they are related or not, and some days you just can’t take it. I don’t completely understand why I have been put in these situations- seems so unfair to have such negative things going on “what seems like” all the time. My soul, my strengthen and my positiveness is ONLY so strong.
Yes... things happen for a reason- but I'm still trying to grasp how this situation will not affect not only my dreams, but the dreams of my future family in mental, physical and financial aspects. My only solution at this point is to let things go as they need to go and as the old saying goes "God won't give me anything I can't handle." Just wish he wouldn't trust me so much.
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